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Penis failure

I have been with my fiance for nearly three years now and have always had trouble keeping up an erection. When we first got together she was my first so everything went quite slow. After about six months everything started to go wrong,I couldn't keep an erection for long. Its now worrying me ad I feel like I cant satisfy her and I got a lot on at work so feel stressed more. If I do keep my erection though I ejacualate really quickly. Please can you help me with please?

Asked by jack
1st February 2015 (in Sex)

Tags: penis dysfunction premature ejaculation erection

Response from Men's Sexual Health:

Your problem is obviously very worrying for you: but you are not the first man to have it, and with help things will get better. From what you have said there there three things that sound important.

She is your first. Without experience it can be difficult to make sex work really well, because you have to learn and the person you are with may not be able to teach you. It may help a lot to discuss what you do with her, to find out what she likes, and to let her know what you like. Talking in confidence with a good friend who has plenty of experience can also help. If this isn't easy, try asking your doctor for referral to a professional

You say you are working hard and are stressed. Even when sex has been good and going well, this can be enough to ruin things! You may even have reached a point where you are worried and anxious that you will lose the erection and this, by itself, can cause it to happen! Try to relax, get good sleep, agree with your fiancee to avoid sex for a few days and then put aside some time to have slow, enjoyable sex – don't rush to penetrate her, have plenty of foreplay. If you find that you ejaculate very quickly when she touches your penis, ask her to stroke and caress other parts of you while you use your hands and mouth to pleasure her. Again, there is professional help if you need it and you can ask your doctor for a referral

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Answered by team member Dr Peter
9th January 2016

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