All questions in Sex

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Penis is not stand

Hi, i just got married 8 months ago. my sex life was very much ok. we intercourse every day with good feelings. Suddenly 4 days ago i realised my Penis is not standing while foreplay. I thought its normal but the next day also same thing happen. its now 4 days my penis is not stand. its not stand even 20 percent. seems no feelings in my Penis. i m worried about it that. Pls suggest me. and let me know is there is any issue.

Asked by Srikant
29th October 2013 (in Sex)

Tags: penis erection

Response from Men's Sexual Health:

Hello and thanks for getting in touch with us. What you are describing is a case of Erectile Dysfunction. This is when a man finds it difficult to get or maintain an erection. There are generally two types of ED, Physiological or Psychological. Physiological issues include - deterioration of the arteries (this is more common in older men), diabetes, smoking, alcoholism, overweight, hormone problems. Psychological issues include, Stress: which could be job related, money issues, relationship issues etc, Anxiety: Once a man experiences ED, he may become overly worried that the problem will happen again. This can lead to "performance anxiety," or a fear of sexual failure, and consistently lead to ED, Guilt: A man may feel guilty that he is not satisfying his partner, Depression : A common cause of ED, depression affects a person physically and psychologically. Depression can cause ED even when a man is completely comfortable in sexual situations. Drugs used to treat depression may also cause ED, Low self-esteem: This can be due to prior episodes of ED (thus a feeling of inadequacy) or can be the result of other issues unrelated to sexual performance, also Childhood abuse has been related to ED. Some men suffer with more than one of the above issues, as some of these cause some of the others to occur.

Are you able to get an erection when you masturabte alone, if you are then it probably shows that there is nothing wrong physiologically with you and this it is more of a psychological issue.

We would recommend speaking to your GP/Doctor so they can determine if it a physiological issue or a psychological issue. The best way to solve psychological ED is therapy with a professional counsellor sex therapist. Discussing you anxiety and fears and concerns will be a big step in dealing with them and overcoming them. Being open and honest with your partner will help this, and may benefit in both attending therapy. If its physiological they will be able to run the appropriate tests and prescribe the right course of treatment for this, please do not seek medications online, you risk being prescribed the wrong medicine or worse, purchasing fake medicine that could end up doing more harm than good, so please make an appointment with your own doctor. But based on what you have said in your question, its prob psychological, performance anxiety, so counselling may help. Please let us know if we can be of further help.

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Answered by team member Matt
1st November 2013

When I jack it out and the white thing is about to come out my penis hurts

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Answered by Ayaan
29th February 2016

To determine whether it is psychological you may want to focus on your train of thought.



The only thing that should be in your head is what you are going to do with your partner, the touch and feel. You can get yourself turned on if you are good at picturing things and have a good imagination.



Personally I use it both ways, this way I can control my ejaculation mentally. It prevents premature ejaculation and gets you ready faster.

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Answered by Kenn
6th July 2016

I may not have clarified enough. If you use the method I mentioned you must be able to think of specific things only. If you think "Am I doing this right?" you have failed already. My girlfriend says she can see it in my eyes clearly when I am focusing my thoughts on this.

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Answered by Kenn
6th July 2016

Which Doctor should we go to for Such Disease Could any one Tell Please ?

Like for tooth we go to Dentist, for ears we go to ENT and Which doctor should we to for such Disease ?

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Answered by Abdullah
19th August 2016

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Penis goes soft

i m a 21 year guy n itx been a year that m in a relation and my girlfriend and me had really enjoyed havin sex bt itx been couple of months that while having sex my dick goes soft with ejaculation or i ejaculate to quick u cn say with in a minute.itx happened so rarely in the begnings bt now its like evry time we do it i have 2 face that.it is really emabarsing for me to go soft again and again in front my gf and she is also thinking that i am not intersted in having sex with her anymore thats why its hapning,let me mension here to that we both r also having problems in our reltionship and we just keep arguing with each other,so i just want to know that whether its a mental or sexual problem.please help me out of this situation

Asked by mr hash
10th June 2009 (in Sex)

Tags: penis ejaculation erection gay

Response from Men's Sexual Health:

The problem you feel you are having actually sounds quite normal. After a man ejaculates, his penis usually becomes soft, returning to its smaller pre-erect state. He will usually need some time to recover, before he can have another erection and ejaculation. This recovery period is called the refractory period, and generally, is quicker for younger men. Some men can have an erection immediately afterwards, some can have a few orgasms/ejaculations in a few hours, whilst others take longer to become erect again. It all falls within the normal parameters of sexual health!

If you had difficulty maintaining an erection during sex, in your circumstance, the most likely cause would be mental; due to the problems you are having in your relationship. Erectile dysfunction, when your penis goes soft during when you don’t want it to, has many causes, both physical and mental and affects most men at some point in their life. To help prevent these kinds of problems in the future, you need to address your relationship issues with your girlfriend. If you've been fighting, even if you're having makeup sex, you most likely have residual worries that weigh on you that can affect you both. She may be experiencing similar feelings of worry, making it difficult for her to orgasm. If you two can work on your relationship issues, and not fight so much, it will no doubt ease the pressure you feel when you are having sex, as wedll as make life together happier! If you are finding that you ejaculate too quickly, again, your mind can play a large part in that. One thing you can try is using condoms, as they can help reduce sensitivity. There are also special condoms and lubricant you can use, that have a slight numbing effect on the penis, to help you last longer. The Delay brand, by Pasante or Performa by Durex, along with other store brands like Boots are specially made to help with premature ejaculation. These products prolong lovemaking by using a low dosage skin numbing ingredient like benzocaine, to reduce sensitivity and postpone orgasm. I hope this all helps. Please get back to us if you have any more questions or worries.

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Answered by team member Mara
11th October 2010

Hello, I am a 57 years old, i love having sex but the last few years it is very difficult to get a erection, when i do it lt last about a minute. Even i am going ejaculate my penis is soft! that can't be normal. I have gone to specialist's and G.P's, for treatment but nothing works. i have tried viagra that doesn't work, so i am absolutely stump!! Oh yes! i have lost two previous relationships over this!

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Answered by michael
12th August 2016

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Leaking pre cum

I have been locked in a chastity device for the past 3 weeks, the last 3 or 4 nights I have been leaking pre cum, and sometimes during the day. During the day when it has happened I have been sitting down watching the television, Is it normal to leak.

Asked by anonymous
10th June 2009 (in Sex)

Tags: precum ejaculation chastity

Response from Men's Sexual Health:

Thanks for getting in touch. The purpose of wearing a chastity device is orgasm denial, and this is either usuallly for personal sexual gratification or relationship reasons. Being denied orgasm will mean the prostate glad in the male anus will have a build up of seminal fluid (pre-cum) and because you are not masturbating or having sex, this will start to seep out, so yes this is normal to leak.

However please be aware, it is actually more healthy to ejaculate, the purpose of masterbation and/or sex is not just for pleasure but is advised for men to keep the prostate healthy. If you are in a chastity device to deny orgasm then you may want to look into milking the prostate, this will help have an orgasm and remove the build up but won't be for sexual gratification purposes. You say it has been for 3 weeks, please be aware if using such a device you remove it frequently for periods of cleaning, as it is very important that you keep the penis clean, to prevent infection and build up of smegma.

I hope this has helped your concern, please get in touch again if needed

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Answered by team member Matt
30th August 2011

Thank you your reply has eased my concerns, obviously quite normal and nothing to worry about.



I clean daily using Q tips and once a week my device is fully removed to enable a complete clean of both the device and my penis.



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Answered by anonymous
4th September 2011

Response from Men's Sexual Health:

I don't know how effective cleaning with q-tips once a day would be, I understand you do a full clean once a week, but it would probably more advisable to remove the device once a day when in the shower or bath to clean the penis effectively.

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Answered by team member Matt
5th September 2011

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Pennis size ?

hello dr. im 21 years old boy from dubai, dr my pennis size is 4 inch i want to grown it how to do that ?dr from last 2 days my pennis is not standing when last time i had sex my pennis was not that hard as before and it sleep so fast while having sex im in tention that this may cause serious problem , im 101 kgs almost im trying to lose weight kindly help me out .

Asked by zayn (aged 21) from United Arab Emirates
13th December 2015 (in Sex)

Tags: penis size premature ejaculation erection gay

Response from Men's Sexual Health:

We all have different penis sizes and shapes. You can't change what you have, although there are a few surgical ways of trying to make your penis more prominent. But actually there are plenty of guys with a penis much shorter than your 4 inches who can and do have good sex. You might like to read the section on our website about penis size. We hope that this information helps, worrying about performance and size will unfortunately contribute to the problems you describe, try not to worry about it and try to focus on other aspects of sex. You might find this response to a previous question helpful too:





Question on Erectile Dysfunction





You say you are overweight, this almost certainly means that the base of your penis is hidden in some fat. It would look and measure more if you could lose weight – we have a section on ideal weight range for your height and weight loss help.



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Answered by team member Dr Peter
9th January 2016

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Water drop during erection and itchy top of penis

thanks for taking your time to read this messege. i have this problem from last many years i would say. whenever i get erection in a minute drops starts coming out of my penis , which firstly effect the erection and i Cum very fast . Also the top end of my penis (Glans) are is gets very itchy which seems to me very serious bcz of that i cant enjoy erection. i did too much masturbation as well.

Asked by shah
6th July 2011 (in Sex)

Tags: precum penis ejaculation premature ejaculation erection masturbation gay

Response from Men's Sexual Health:

Thanks for getting in touch. It sounds like you are describing pre-cum, not all men get this, and those that do it can vary from just a little leak to a lot, but let me reasure you this is perfectly normall. Pre-cum is a clear fluid that emits from the tip of the penis when a man is sexually aroused, and its purpose is to act as a lubricant (please be aware this can transmit STI, HIV and can contain sperm if you are not using barrier methods such as condoms to have safe sex with). In very rare cases some men over produce this, if this is the case I would discuss with you GP if possible.

Regarding the cumming very fast, this could be for various reasons, and I wouldn't say it has anything to do with your pre-cum. Many men suffer from Premature ejaculation, a recent UK survey said 10% of male population had suffered with PE at some point in their life. Another European study classed PE as lasting around 1.8 mins, and with 7.3 mins being classed as normal, would you say you fall into this first category as what you class as PE might not be PE. There are initially 4 treatments for PE - 1) Distraction method - when you are nearing climax, think about something comepletely different than whats going on. 2) Applying a delay gel to your penis, this will decrease sensitivity and hopefully improve your duration. 3) Delay condoms, this are coated with the delay gel and with the added thickness of the condom this too will help improve your duration. 4) start stop method - when alone try masterbating till u reach the point where you are going to climax but stop yourself, repeat this 3 or 4 times to build up your own self control, and then allow yourself to climax, after a few times a week doing this, you should find yourself lasting longer.

Regarding the itchy end of your penis, if you masturbate too often then yes the penis could become sore, but there could also be other reasons, it could be a reaction to soap or cleaning product you are currently using, or it could be and Sexually Transmitted Infection (STI), again I would recommend going to you doctor/GP and explain your concerns and get tested as most STI's can be treated.

Please get back to us if you still have any further concerns.

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Answered by team member Matt
7th July 2011

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Gay Virgins

Can two gay men get an std or sti during anal and oral sex.? both are virgins and std free.

Asked by anonymous
9th March 2013 (in Sex)

Tags: gay oral sex sti

Response from Men's Sexual Health:

Hello and thanks for contacting Men's Sexual Health. There is a fair lot to discuss here! For a start, only each individual person knows if they are a virgin. By this I mean that some people claim to be virgins for many reasons, one of which could be to ensure that the other person thinks they are STD/STI clean. I'm not saying the other person is lying, but it's something to keep in mind as only you can be sure of your own virginity. Also I might question the term "virgin" - does that mean they have not had penetrative sex, but have explored other sexual activity, or that they have had no sexual activity at all? Different people apply the term virgin in various ways depending on how much or what kind of sexual activity they have or haven't experienced. The concern is that one or both people who claim to be virgins may have had oral sex, for example, which DOES put them at risk of certain STI's/STD's. So, although a virgin in anal/vaginal sex, it doesn't mean 100% virgin or 100% free of STI/STD. What I'm saying is that if both are truly 100% virgins it is pretty unlikely that a transmission of an STI would occur - we would never say it's impossible as it would be wrong of us to suggest this. However, you need to be aware that sex with any new partner carries some amount of risk even if one or both claim to be virgins based on the information we discussed at the start. Also some people think they have no STI's because many STI's have no visible signs or symptoms.

Condoms offer the best protection against STI's and HIV, if you do not plan/want to use condoms we would suggest a visit to your local GUM clinic. You can go as a couple, you could both be tested and get the results together and then you would know for sure that you are both free from STI's. It may sound like a lot of bother, but you should never go ahead and have sex just because you both "claim" to be virgins as this might cause you harm without having all the information and knowledge of the possible risks. Having sex for the first time is a big step, please ensure it is something you both want and that neither partner is being pressured into something they are not ready for. We would also recommend using lube for anal sex; due to the lack of natural lubrication in the arse, this will also help reduce any pain.

Condoms offer the best protection against STI's/HIV, if you do not plan/want to use condoms we would suggest a visit to your local GUM clinic, you can go as a couple, you could both be tested and get the results together then you would know for sure that you are both free from STI's. It may sound like a lot to go through with, but we could never say go ahead and have sex because you both claim to be virgins to then put you at harm with out full information and knowledge of what the risks are. Having sex for the first time is a big step, please ensure it is something you both want, and neither partner is being pressured into something they are not ready for. We would also recommend using lube for anal sex, due to the lack of natural lubrication in the arse, this will also help reduce any pain. If you live in Swindon, we can order free condoms and/or lube from our website. Please get back in touch if you would like further advice on this subject

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Answered by team member Matt
11th March 2013

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Sperm comes out faster some time on only touching and penis is not getting hard it is lose and short

Sir/mam when ever I geting sex with my gf. My sperm comes faster some times only on touching and my penis is not so much tight and long

Asked by Ravi Kumar (aged 20) from India
23rd November 2015 (in Sex)

Tags: penis ejaculation erection gay

Response from Men's Sexual Health:

Ejaculating very quickly ("premature ejaculation") is quite a common problem and it often settles down and stops happening as you get older and more experienced sexually.





When you are having sex with someone else, a longer period of foreplay without touching your penis can improve it for you both. Try to find things to do for each other which feel nice without any contact with your penis. Then, if you go inside her, if you pull out again soon before you reach a climax and you (or your partner) squeeze your penis hard below the head, this will usually stop the climax and after a few moments you can start again. You can also try this technique when you are masturbating and see if you can control your orgasm and cum later.





There is professional help available from sex therapists if you are able to see one of them



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Answered by team member Dr Peter
9th January 2016

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Penis hurts and goes soft during sex

I am a 30 year old man and a couple of weeks ago i was having sex with my girlfriend and it popped and since then my penis has been going numb during sex and also goes soft. some stuff comes out of it when its hard, but its not cum or pre cum. it also hurts to pee sometimes. i dont have a problem gettin hard, just goes soft during sex

Asked by jc
22nd December 2010 (in Sex)

Tags: penis ejaculation erection gay

Response from Men's Sexual Health:

There is a chance you might haveincurred a penile fracture. The popping sound you mention is an indication of this. A penile fracture normally results in the penis going limp, with significant pain and brusing to the area. Since you don't mention any of these other symptoms this might not be what has happened, but we would recommend seeking medical help from your GP on this issue as leaving a penile fracture could result in further issues around maintaining an erection.

Regarding the fluid coming out of your penis, I don't know if this could be related to your injury, but the most common reason for a discharge from the penis, that is not cum or pre cum, would be an STI (sexually transmitted infection) such as chlamydia or gonorrhea. The pain when you urinate could also come from an STI. These can be tested for at your local GUM clinic, or when you see you GP regarding the possible penile fracture.

If you have any further questions please come back to our site or give us a call, but we would recommend seeing your GP soon.

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Answered by team member Matt
22nd December 2010

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Male Chastity

When a male chastity device is worn and sex or orgasm is denied, how often should milking be performed.

Asked by anonymous
4th September 2011 (in Sex)

Tags: chastity

Response from Men's Sexual Health:

To keep the prostate healthy it is reccommended that at least once a week you should milk the prostate gland to allow the seminal fluids to drain through the penis - effectively pre-ejaculatory fluids - if left alone too long could develop bacteria and cause health issues.

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Answered by team member Matt
5th September 2011

Thank you for the reply and I will take that advice seriously, It's one thing to be put in chastity for sexual gratification, and to finish up with health issues would not be good.



What are the health issues if your advice was ignored, I won't be ignoring your advice but would like to learn more, just for interest and i could also pass the information on to other chastity wearers I know.

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Answered by anonymous
6th September 2011

Response from Men's Sexual Health:

Regarding the cleaning, a variety of bacterial infections could occur, including yeast infections, uriniary tract problems, which can lead to kindey infections, and the build up of smegma (the white substance) if not cleared away and cleaned could possibly lead to balanitis, this can depend of course if you are circumsised or not.

Regarding the prostate, research has shown that having ejaculations reduces the risk of developing prostate cancer, if you look at our news item on the front page, prostate cancer is the most common form of cancer in Men.

I hope this has helped inform you and others more. So long as you do clean the penis and milk the prostate, male chastity should be harmless.

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Answered by team member Matt
7th September 2011

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Pre cum and losing erection

Hi, whenever I try and have sex, I generate some amount of precum, i understand its normal, but because of that I lose my erection within a minute or so and then don't get erect enough to perform intercourse. I am a 25year old male and have no other health problems. Also this doesn't happen during masturbation.

Asked by Adam
9th September 2013 (in Sex)

Tags: precum ejaculation erection masturbation

Response from Men's Sexual Health:

Hello and thanks for getting in touch with us. There are two areas for erectile dysfunction, it is either a physiological issue or a psychological issue. As you are able to get an erection when masturbating, this shows it is not a physiological issue, just a psychological issue. What is it about pre-cum that causes you to lose your erection, as surely this also gets produced when you are masturbating. You seem to be suffering with some form of performance anxiety, you may benefit from some of sexual therapy/counselling to get over this issue. Please get in touch if you have further info/help needed.

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Answered by team member Matt
11th September 2013

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My penis is not standing

sir m 18yrs n for last 2yrs i hv nt shaken penis and now it doesn't stand may i watch porno/blue flim or any sex time in front of me, so give me solution how my penis may stand?

Asked by dhanno
6th November 2013 (in Sex)

Tags: penis erection

Response from Men's Sexual Health:

Hello and thanks for getting in touch with us. What you are describing is a case of Erectile Dysfunction. This is when a man finds it difficult to get or maintain an erection. There are generally two types of ED, Physiological or Psychological. Physiological issues include - deterioration of the arteries (this is more common in older men), diabetes, smoking, alcoholism, overweight, hormone problems. Psychological issues include, Stress: which could be job related, money issues, relationship issues etc, Anxiety: Once a man experiences ED, he may become overly worried that the problem will happen again. This can lead to "performance anxiety," or a fear of sexual failure, and consistently lead to ED, Guilt: A man may feel guilty that he is not satisfying his partner, Depression : A common cause of ED, depression affects a person physically and psychologically. Depression can cause ED even when a man is completely comfortable in sexual situations. Drugs used to treat depression may also cause ED, Low self-esteem: This can be due to prior episodes of ED (thus a feeling of inadequacy) or can be the result of other issues unrelated to sexual performance, also Childhood abuse has been related to ED. Some men suffer with more than one of the above issues, as some of these cause some of the others to occur. We would recommend speaking to your GP/Doctor so they can determine if it a physiological issue or a psychological issue. The best way to solve psychological ED is therapy with a professional counsellor sex therapist. Discussing you anxiety and fears and concerns will be a big step in dealing with them and overcoming them. If its physiological they will be able to run the appropriate tests and prescribe the right course of treatment for this, please do not seek medications online, you risk being prescribed the wrong medicine or worse, purchasing fake medicine that could end up doing more harm than good, so please make an appointment with your own doctor so they can explore what is causing this.

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Answered by team member Matt
8th November 2013

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Penis not hard and shoot to soon

I'm going to gym for a year now, the problem is my discharge time(sperm) is reduce and Penis is not become Hard as earlier so i think gym training is the cause of this problem, what you suggest, answer me please.

Asked by Ricky
8th February 2013 (in Sex)

Tags: penis erection discharge

Response from Men's Sexual Health:

Thank you for contacting Men's Seuxal Health. You seem to have two concerns, your penis not getting hard and ejaculating (discharge) too soon. I will attempt to address both these issue. First, erection problems are either a physical issue, or psychological issue. Most men have experienced some form of erectile issue during their life, some its a passing phase, others it can be a longer issue where support is needed, and that could be medical or psychological depending on whats causing it

For example some Physical issues include - deterioration of the arteries (this is more common in older men), diabetes, smoking, alcoholism, overweight, hormone problems. And some Psychological issues include - anxiety/nerves, relationship problems, depression, exhaustion, stress, childhood abuse.

It is unlikely the fact that you go to the gym that is causing this, usually the fact that you go to the gym is a positive good thing, and would normally effect the body in a good way.

Regarding your second issue, discharging too soon, again many men suffer from Premature ejaculation, a recent UK survey said 10% of male population had suffered with PE at some point in their life. Another European study classed PE as lasting around 1.8 mins, and with 7.3 mins being classed as normal, would you say you fall into this first category as what you class as PE might not be PE. There are initially 4 treatments for PE - 1) Distraction method - when you are nearing climax, think about something comepletely different than whats going on. 2) Applying a delay gel to your penis, this will decrease sensitivity and hopefully improve your duration. 3) Delay condoms, this are coated with the delay gel and with the added thickness of the condom this too will help improve your duration. 4) start stop method - when alone try masterbating till u reach the point where you are going to climax but stop yourself, repeat this 3 or 4 times to build up your own self control, and then allow yourself to climax, after a few times a week doing this, you should find yourself lasting longer. The penis will naturally lose erection most times after ejaculation, but after a short period of rest time, some men are able to get erect and ejaculate again. Again it is unlikely that going to the gym is causing this issue either. The fact you are suffering from both erection and premature ejaculation makes me think you have more of a psychological problem to overcome than anything going on with your body physically. We would suggest trying some sexual therapy/counselling, if you live in the Swindon area we can provide this for free. You could also discuss this with your GP/Doctor to confirm there is no underlying health issues going on and they should also be able to suggest a good counselling service if they also think you would benefit from such treatment. Please get back in touch if you need any further advice or support.

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Answered by team member Matt
12th February 2013

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Penis does not become tight

i am 33 years old boy.during intercourse my penis doesn't get hard,as it should be, before i had not problem like this.i can not make happy my wife.please advice me.

Asked by sonu
10th June 2009 (in Sex)

Tags: penis

Response from Men's Sexual Health:

Hello and thank you for contacting MSH with your concern. Most men will find they have difficulty getting an erection, or hard, at sometime in their life. This is entirely normal and can happen for a number of reasons, both physical and psychological. As you do not give us much information to go on, it is hard to say what could be contributing to this problem, but if you have a look through the questions and answers on this page, you will find a lot of advice about differing situations. As a first step, try not to focus on the problem and relax. The more pressure you put on yourself to get hard, the more difficult it will become. It is worth having a look at everyday factors in your life that may be causing you worry, as these things can effect your ability to relax and become sexually aroused. If you are able to discuss this with your wife, she may be able to help further put your mind at ease and you two can explore being intimate without having sexual intercourse, take the pressure of getting and maintaining an erection off of you and allowing you to enjoy yourself more. Things like smoking, drinking and being overweight can also effect your ability to have a strong erection. If you are worried that there is actually something physically wrong with you, it is wise to book an appointment to see a doctor, where they can give you further advice and perhaps prescribe medication is the problem is ongoing and serious. Please do have a read through our past questions and see if there is anything you can specifically relate to, or if you have further information you would like to share, please get back in touch with us.

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Answered by team member Mara
17th August 2013

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I was 15 years old i do handpumping to penis daily so in what age should i have to stop this to become a father?

I found that if we are doing handpumping to penis we would not become a father so i have to know that i what age do we stop this to become father?

Asked by karan chauhan
5th October 2013 (in Sex)

Tags: penis masturbation

Response from Men's Sexual Health:

Hello and thanks for getting in contact with us. Masturbating/handpumping will not stop you from becoming a father. Most men will continue to masturbate for most of there life, this is normal and healthy. However some may stop for a few weeks when they are trying for a baby to ensure they have a good amount of sperm when having sex, but the body reproduces sperm at a fast rate within 24hrs, so maybe refrain for a couple of days before having sex in the hopes of making a baby, but your certainly don't need to stop all together at some point in your life. We hope this has helped with your concern please get back in touch if we can help further

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Answered by team member Matt
15th October 2013

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Am I gay?

I’m heterosexual and happily married but I’m attracted to men. Am I gay?

Asked by anonymous
25th May 2009 (in Sex)

Tags: gay

Response from Men's Sexual Health:

Many people are attracted to people of the same sex, it does not necessarily mean you're gay, unfortunately based on the limited information given it's difficult to be precise, but you could possibly be bisexual, which is where an individual is attracted to both men and women.

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Answered by team member Mark
25th May 2009

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Penis size in porn and self confidence

watching porn is taking my self confidence to please my gf just because my 5.5 inch dick is not as big as those porn stars with 10 or more. now this feeling is changed from wishing to have a big dick to getting fuck by a big dick instead nd i start wathing gay porn just for the fantacy of getting fucked. i am straight but this gay feeling is worrying maself where am i heading ?? please help . thnx

Asked by sam
20th February 2013 (in Sex)

Tags: penis penis size gay

Response from Men's Sexual Health:

Thanks for getting in contact with MSH. Penis size is one of the most common questions we get asked about on the Q&A, as it is one of the most popular concerns men heave, and nearly all have wished theirs was bigger during some point in their life. A lot of it can be due, like yourself, to watching porn and seeing how big other men are, but the men in porn tend to always be very well hung, its just the way the porn industry seems to work. But yes this can have a knock on effect on many mens confidence seeing this. Some men are so unsatisfied it can cause them great distress and make them seek out ways to increase their size. Please ignore any adverts you find on the internet, in magazines or emails claiming to make your penis bigger via any form of pills, you could be putting yourself in more harm and these pills do not work. The only way to change the size of your penis is through surgery and this is extremely risky and could result in you unable to get an erection. The male penis comes in all shapes and sizes, all over the world there are different sizes, for example in India the average size is 4 inches, the UK is 5.5 and the congo in Africa is 7. So you are in fact average for the UK. We are all built differently and never let someone make you feel inadequate with what you have, people fall in love with the person not the penis. There are many different positions you can try with a partner so that you are both sexually satisfied, experiment and see what works best for you.

Regarding your feelings and thoughts of being penetrated by another man, this doesn't mean you are gay or bi, we all have different fantasy's and desires, and how we chose to go about exploring these is down to the individual. I'm sure a lot of men may have had that thought cross their mind at when watching porn, not all men, but some, and some probably didnt do anything about it, others may have explored that desire and experimented, maybe with probing their anus with their own finger, or maybe even buying a dildo. But you may when you feel comfortable to try it with a man, and it may be something you enjoy or in the end you don't. But do remember if you do explore this with another guy, to use plenty of lube and condoms as anal sex is a more risky type of sex and puts you at more risk from catching an STI or HIV, so always be safe.

You may benefit from some form of sexual counselling regarding your confidence and discussing these sexual fantasy's, and if you live in Swindon please get in touch as we offer a free counselling service. I hope this has put your mind at ease a bit, but please do get back in touch if we can be of further support or advice

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Answered by team member Matt
22nd February 2013

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About my cock and cum

iam 19 yrs old.im making my self happier by involving in hand practise.Im doing it since 4 yrs.But im not satisfied with the puss coming out of my dick.Ill be satisfied if i get more and more puss out of my dick as same as shown in many sex websites.Im getting only a little bit of puss.Is there any safe methods

Asked by varunkumar
9th February 2013 (in Sex)

Tags: penis ejaculation masturbation gay

Response from Men's Sexual Health:

Thank you for getting in touch with Men's Sexual Health. When you say puss, I'm assuming you mean semen/sperm/cum. All men are different regarding how much cum/puss they produce and how far it shots, what it looks like, what it tastes like etc. In sex website, porn, it doesn't generally reflect your average man, the men will generally be very well built, have big cocks and shot lots of cum, and many many men find watching porn depressing as they don't match up to what they see on the screen. Do not get upset by this, what happens in porn is unrealistic for most of the population. However you could try two methods which may increase how much you shot. One safe technique is called 'edging' where a man during masturbation/wanking/hand practice will stop masturbating just before he cums/shoots, lets the moment pass and then slowly continues till he nearly reaches cumming/climax again and stops, this is repeated for a while till he can last no more and most will find this produces bigger, stronger orgasms and more cum. The second safe method is trying kegel exercises/pc muscle. When going to the toilet to pee/urinate, try stopping mid flow, the muscle you contract to stop peeing is the PC muscle, try contracting and releasing that during any time of the day for a few minutes each day, exercising this muscle, this is also meant to help you have bigger and more intense orgasms. But ultimately try not to worry, some men shot a lot and some men don't, its not a big deal. Please get back in touch if we can help any further.

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Answered by team member Matt
13th February 2013

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I ejaculate too quick, how can i stop this?

ive been with my wife 12 years, and i really enjoy our sexual relationship, although i do ejaculate too quick which means me and my wife dont get the fullness of enjoyment, i dont no how to stop this from happenening, im desperate, please help

Asked by sam
18th January 2010 (in Sex)

Tags: ejaculation

Response from Men's Sexual Health:

Premature Ejaculation is a very common condition, with reports of well over 50% of men being affected at some time in their lives, for some men, it is a temporary problem, and for others it can be a longer term problem.



There are many factors that can cause this ranging from depression through to a highly sensitive Glans (Head of the Penis). However, in most cases, the cause can be treated very easily.



There are various different ways of helping to overcome this condition, and it will depend on the cause, in some cases it may be about how you are having sexual intercourse, and in some cases it may be that some medication is needed.



We would suggest making an appointment to see your own GP, it is appreciated that you may feel quite embarrassed to discuss this, but please be assured that this is one condition your GP deals with very frequently. Remember this is one of those conditions that men rarely talk about, so not only can you feel embarrassed to talk to your GP about it, but you rarely hear of it simple because men don’t tell others about it



Once the GP has seen you, they will be best able to recommend what will work with you, thus alleviating this problem.

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Answered by team member Tim
18th January 2010

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Masturbation issue

my problem is of masturbation i feel very tired always sperm scomes out from my urine also my penis is also too short my sperms out too early plz tell me is that any serious problem

Asked by gaurav
18th September 2013 (in Sex)

Tags: penis ejaculation premature ejaculation masturbation gay

Response from Men's Sexual Health:

Your questions confuse me a bit. When do you feel tired?





Sometimes there is leakage of semen in your urine if you have been aroused a little while earlier – this is normal





What makes you think your penis is too short? 





If your sperms come out early, is this during masturbation, during sex, or even before you touch your penis? 





If you can write giving some more information we may be able to help with some advice



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Answered by team member Dr Peter
9th January 2016

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Sex

i want to know is it possible to catch any disease or virus if we just kiss the vagina/anal areas and and lick just outside and not inside.

Asked by anonymous
25th November 2009 (in Sex)

Tags: oral sex virus disease

Response from Men's Sexual Health:

There are several risks involved in the licking and kissing of virginal/anal areas of the body, especially internal licking. One of the most common infections is Hepatitis B, which can be contracted from any residue faecal matter, especially around the anal area. You could also contract Chlamydia, which is a bacterial infection and is on the increase in the UK and can be caught through licking (Remember a high percentage of people with Chlamydia do not display any symptoms). Unfortunately most STIs (sexually Transmitted Infections) can also be caught through oral sex, which you should be aware of; but you also have to bear in mind that many people do enjoy oral sex without any complications or contracting infections. On our website we have a comprehensive guide to all the possible STI’s which we would recommend you look at so that you can decide for yourselves the risks involved.

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Answered by team member Tim
3rd December 2009





Azithromycin is the main treatment for Chlamydia



1 gram – single dose Efficacious and well tolerated Highly effective ( 95%) and compliance high



You take two tablets together and these get to work in the system and after about 7 days the infection is cleared it is recomended that poeple abstain from sexual contact until both partners are 7 days post treatment. For further information on Chlamydia see www.itsbesttotest.nhs.uk or contact the screening team on info@itsbesttotest.nhs.uk



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Answered by Tracy Daszkiewicz
5th January 2010