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Sensitive penis and long refractory period

My boyfriend has an extremely long refractory period. After he orgasms it causes him physical pain if he gets an erection within at least the next 24 hours. This means that he can't take part any kind of sexual activities because as soon as he gets into it, he's then in pain. I have quite a high libido and I don't want to make him feel inadequate if I'm always up for it sooner than he can physically do anything. Is there anything that could help with his pain?

Asked by anonymous
24th January 2015 (in Sex)

Tags: horny penis erection sensitive

Response from Men's Sexual Health:

This is a difficult question. There are quite a few men who get a "post ejaculation syndrome" which can take several forms from severe headache, pain in the testicles, muscle pains, to guilt, depression and extreme lethargy. We don’t really understand why it happens, but it is thought to be a mix of physical hormonal causes and psychological ones. Although it can be very distressing, it is not serious in a physical sense.

I don’t know of any definite treatment for your boyfriend’s problem, but often with this type of thing it pays to explore it sensitively with a professional. Your local family planning/sexual health clinic maybe able to help.

Probably the most important thing you can do is to talk freely about it and let him know that you are supportive. Either partner in a relationship may have a problem and feel guilty or inadequate. They will usually benefit from being able to explore it openly and non-judgmentally. We can’t all be Superman in bed – perhaps you might ask him if he would like to do some thing(s) for you which avoids getting an erection himself?

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Answered by team member Dr Peter
8th December 2015

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